First Times
by Kira

I can do this.  I am ready for this.  I am a strong, capable teacher.  I know my material.  I have studied the last seven years for this moment.  God, my palms are sweating,.  Where the hell's my tissue?  Deep breaths.  Deep, deep breaths.

I am an ocean of calm.  I am an ocean of calm.  Oh geez, who the hell am I kidding.  Calm down stomach.  Calm down.  Hurling in front of everyone is *so* not the way to start this.  Oh shit, my notes.  Where are they?  Oh, man, oh, man, oh, man.

Thank god.

Books.  Check.  Chalk.  Check.  Notes.  Yup.  Outline.  Yup.  Attendance sheet.  Check.

Okay.  I can do this.  Just open the door.

Open the door.  DO IT!

"Hi, welcome to Anthropology 101.  My name is Blair Sandburg and I'll be your instructor this year. "


God, its hot.  Those fucking mosquitoes are going to drive me insane.  Like I'm not halfway there already.  My legs are killing me.  Don't let the sergeant see you wince.  Don't wince.  Don't move.

Oh man, I've got to piss.  This is not the time.  Hold it in.  Hold it in.

What the hell was that?  Oh shit.  Oh shit.  There's more than there should be.  Don't run.  Don't run.  You can do this.  Just like training.  Just like training.  Point, aim, fire.  You can do it.  Don't freeze.

Wait...wait...they're not in range yet.  Damn these stupid trees.  How the hell did we end up in the damn jungle, anyway?  Join the army; see the world.  Wait...just a few more second.

What the hell is that thumping sound?   Tune it out.  Okay, quiet, soft.  Pull up the gun.  Oh god, I'm going to be sick.    The enemy.  Faceless, nameless.  Stuffed targets.  Not people.  Point the gun.

Now! Pull the trigger!!

Perfect shot.  Oh god.  Don't puke.  Don't you dare fucking puke.  Not now.  Thank god that thumping's stopped.  Move out.  Come on legs.  Don't fail me now.